To Harris

I've been told, by those who are sensitive to these things, that a spirit can be summoned at almost any time. Sometimes it takes a day or two, but that's still pretty good. I can't imagine why a spirit wouldn't browse the web, if they're able to browse the world. Perhaps the mention of their name calls their attention from intangible places.

I still recall things that you may have forgotten. Drawings you've sent me using MS Paint. A day when you, my father, and I were driving through Monroe. A marinated chicken dish you once made that I liked. Meeting up with you in the Stratosphere casino in Las Vegas. Even the unmistakeable sound of your voice on the telephone saying "Hey kiddo."

I remember seeing you on TV in movies and shows that I didn't even know you were in. Imagine a young me, sitting in the family room watching Stuart Saves His Family, seeing my dad's best friend appear onscreen playing the mean old neighbor who confiscates the neighborhood kids' football. This almost became common, watching television and suddenly going, "oh hey, there's Harris."

If only we could say those four words again, it would give some comfort to your friends. If a spirit can visit the living at any time, feel free to stop by. I'm sure I'll at least see you in films once in a while.

I'm fortunate to have known you. Rest in peace, Harris Laskawy.

-Nick


Harris Laskawy, left. Paul Doniger, right. New York, 1969.

Summer 2010

It has been a while since I've blogged, and I think the two or three of you who follow my blog deserve updates.

I am contemplating moving to the Brooklyn, NY area around the end of August or beginning of September. Very seriously contemplating. My sister is planning to go to school in the city, and her boyfriend will surely move in with her. Lauryn and I are both in our mid-twenties, living at home, and feeling like an escape would allow our lives to blossom both individually and together. While we have only been dating for a couple months, it's pretty obvious that we're serious enough to consider sharing a place with Alex and her boyfriend.

Of course, this may require me to do a lot of my freelance writing for wisegeek.com, and it will require me to look for other work. I'm not sure what other work I should seek, except that I need insurance. I just recently finished my internship term with Shakesperience Productions, an amazing theatre and acting class company based out of Waterbury, CT. As much as I grew to love them, I do not think it would be feasible of me to work for them.

This move may also take some toll on my music-making, though it may also help my music flourish. I would have to come back home on weekends or other times for recording sessions of my project, which is now going by the name STRIX NEBULOSA. As of now, I have five songs written, with drums programmed for two, and I have already visited the place where I hope to record the project. Additionally, my friend Nick, who is also a part of SN, has found us a session bassist.

Life is confusing and strange and exciting and more strange. Constantly.

-Nick

In Shattered Nothing

In Shattered Silence was a pretty nice idea for a band, but it's not happening. Too bad I spent hundreds on gas money and countless hours writing music for nothing. I should probably get the drummer to reimburse for the gas to drive to his house since he's the one who fucked it up. I'm pretty fucking pissed.

I'm writing music for my doomy metal project still, which will not be titled Whispering Woods due to some conflicts. I am currently leaning towards the name Strix Nebulosa, which is the Latin word for a "great gray owl." Next song I'm working on is "Red Moon," and I'm pretty excited about the riffs I have so far. It's the 'doomiest' one yet, very slow and melancholic.

Is All Life Disappointment?

Or is it just all people? I should listen to my own blogs more.

Formspring!

Acks me some questions on Formspring!

Nick's Funky Formspring Page

Intuition

Strong intuition should be taken seriously. If you believe there is something wrong about a person you know, keep a cautious eye out. Intuition is a powerful and mystical force.

My intuition is telling me to look out for myself and not rely on others. I am going to listen to this. I am determined to fabricate my own good fortune. Other people get in the way and bring disappointment.

This post may sound negative but it is not. It is my wisdom to you, the reader.

The end of what never started

IN SHATTERED SILENCE, just about a month before our first show was set to begin, has gone on hiatus. I don't know what the future of the band will be. The music is too good to leave alone, but we are not sure if we can move forward due to reasons that are difficult to explain. I only wish I could have done at least one show after dedicating every Sunday for the past several months to this band, and all the time I spent at home writing lyrics and working on my vocal parts.

Hopefully there will still be a future with some of the musicians I have been working with, in whatever manifestation it may take. I will keep all of you updated... all two of you who read this.

-Nick

I love it when you call me Big Poppa

Writing progress for Whispering Woods

So, as any of you frequent readers know, I am working on my own sort of "solo project" tentatively titled Whispering Woods (ooh double alliteration!), on the side of singing for the upcoming CT prog metal band In Shattered Silence. I've got music and lyrics down for four Whispering Woods songs, and recently timed them. For some reason, that excited me and made me want to make this post. Here's what I got:

"What Still Remains" 3:50
Heavy, dark, eerie, moves between fast and slow a lot. Vocals will mostly be harsh and death metally, but with some screechy falsetto stuff too.

"Lady In White" 5:16
A bit prettier and more melodic, but still spooky. Will feature more singing than harsh vocals, but a bit of both.

"Ember In A Dark Shroud" 3:50
Kind of a pounding, unrelenting song. Sometimes black metal-ish, sometimes thrashy. Probably some 'gravelly singing' and harsh vocals.

"Projected Visions In Sleep Paralysis" 4:30
My darkest, creepiest one yet. Very slow and doomy, but with random fast parts to freak you out. Probably all harsh vocals.

My guitarist friend who's also named Nick will be featured in this project for some guitar harmonies and leads/solos etc., since he's a way more capable guitarist than I. I'm fleshing out the 'skeletons' of the songs and writing the lyrics and stuff, and he's helping me BAMF it up!

Anyway, hope you'll all be interested in hearing this some day when it gets recorded (who the hell knows when that will be). Warning: not for wussies!!!

-Nick

WWW X: Woman of My Dreams

Words from the Whispering Woods X:
Woman of My Dreams
4 March 2010

I know who you are.
Your face disguised
And darkened hair
And aged features
Fool me not.
Woman of my dreams,
My complementary soul,
Tell me what reason
I should have
To experience this deja vu?
What is this place?
You bring me to a room,
A place indoors but outdoors,
A place I have never seen;
A place hauntingly familiar to me.
Is our future
Being cast before me
As a series
Of quick-moving, blurred images?
I believe you know
Exactly what this means.
I believe you manipulated
This surrealist sleep.
Tell me we will be together.
Tell me this bliss
Is waiting for me.
Woman of my dreams,
Find me.
I know who you are.

Politics, Broken Down By Me

The Conservative: The wealthy worked hard for what they have. No one has the right to deprive them of the fruits of their labor.

The Liberal: The world does not work as fairly as The Conservative asserts. People are often blessed with good fortune or plagued with ill fortune.

The Right-Wing Libertarian: The Liberal is correct that the world is not fair, but it is not our duty to change the laws of nature.

The Left-Wing Anarchist: The injustice in our world is spurred by the corruption of governments. Humans may be imperfect, but our individual virtues still outweigh the virtues of any government.

The Nihilist: We're all fucked, so shut up and have a beer.

The Nihilist's Friend: Good idea, Nick.

So Long

It's been six months. I still write. I finally finished getting that degree, but am having trouble finding work. I'm curious as to how you're doing with work. Or what you're doing. Music has become even bigger for me. I'm making it again. I never should have stopped that, and now I realize it. I wonder what you would think about it. I keep hearing "It Won't Fade" by Sonata Arctica.

Shamandalie

Sometimes we need to be cruel to be kind.

-SONATA ARCTICA

Project in the Works

Slightly more positive post than last time...

My music project tentatively titled Whispering Woods, which I've been planning for a few years, is very likely coming to fruition quite soon. So far, I have written music for "What Still Remains" and "Lady in White" (lyrics to both are available in the 2009 section of this blog), and I have a friend, also named Nick, who is working with me writing harmonies and leads and stuff for all my guitar parts. Hopefully his brother will be willing and able to work with us as well, as he is also a great musician and might be able to help us record rough tracks. Note: this is not a band. This will just be my own recorded music.

For any of you who are unfamiliar with my concept for this project, it is going to sort of represent my darker side. All lyrics for it revolve around the supernatural and the unknown, and the music is going to be pretty dark and sinister. The sound mirrors the concept - often very slow paced and doomy, though with some occasional fast black metal-ish parts strewn about, and very heavily layered. I tried to describe the sound to a friend of mine, and she responded "so... metal that could be in a Tim Burton movie?" That description sounded right on.

I have no interest in really trying to emulate any other band, but if I had to come up with a list of "influences" for this, it would include Opeth (of course), Ihsahn, Emperor, Swallow the Sun, Immortal, and maybe even a MUCH slower-tempo Slayer vibe in some of the riffs.

For all three or four of you who read my blog, I'll keep you posted!

-Nick

2010

This might be the most negative post yet.

So far, this year has managed to do nothing but disappoint me. I can't figure out what kind of job I want to get. My dog died. I was severely hurt by someone. The only thing I could ever say was "at least music is the one thing that never lets me down." Well, even that's not always true. Music can let you down, when you're a musician and things don't go well. Basically, nothing DOESN'T disappoint me.

I'm ready for something to go right. I have to take charge of my life for that to happen, and not rely on others. At all. That's my new resolution.